More rants from a female mind

Ok, what's with guys really? God help me I love them but why are all men such jerks, thinking myself a scientist I would hate to generalize however I have not found any proof that there is any other state a male comes in. Ok I have written in detail about my breakup with my ex, and about our attempts at friendship and how they failed. A couple weeks ago he contacted me and said he was going to the hospital for day surgery, and alas well and good I tell him I'll visit him. After all I have an obligation because he visited me. But I warn him that if she's there I wont stay, he doesn't reply and I don't care. Oh also I almost forgot to mention that in the e-mail he said "oh so are we talking again" and I replied no. Because lets face it I don't want to talk to him.

Today I got an e-mail from him again saying he thinks we're ready to try the friendship thing again... And much to my dismay I found he still had the power to provoke emotion, more anger then anything else. So calmly I replied that I wasn't ready and I would e-mail him when I was. After all our first attempts didn't fail because of him, I couldn't forgive him and every moment we spent together all I could think about was the horrible things he had done to me.

But why does this man keep bugging me to be friends with him? I have no desire to even pass a friendly word with him let alone a whole coffee. Does what I think affect him so much? Well I don't care what he feels, I want no part in him he has become everything I despise about mankind.

Now it wouldn't be fair to judge the whole sex on one man, I've heard enough horror stories from other girls about how their guys treat them. My mom has to be one o the better cases though, her relatioship embodies everything a woman hates about their relationship to men. First of all you have to realize what my step father is like, he works all day with people, in an industry he's good at but is absolutely miserable being a part of. He comes home and wants to spend time with my mother, which is normal enough but if she doesn't feel like going out to the hot tub he sulks, or if she doesn't have dinner ready he What's for someone else to make it, or if no one clears his plate he wont do it he'll leave it lying on the table.

Up to this point its all understandable, he complains to my mother they never do anything, when as a couple they haven't made any friends to hang around with. He is overly protective of my mother, if she talks to an old guy friend from up north he practically throws a fit, while he'll go behind her back and drive other girls to work, where does he get off? Not only that when my mom wants to do something like a lady's night out or something he sulks and is miserable.

That is the word my mother uses to describer her husband "miserable" and the way she says it. I want her to be happy, but I think she may have picked the wrong man for it. Not that he's all bad, he can be a nice guy but you always feel like you have to be careful around him, its hard to explain why. But that's my post as to why guys suck, well in the relatioship field anyways LOL.

Write me a song; one that makes all the girls cry

Do you ever wonder what influence music has in our life, I don't mean to sound deeper then I am, or stoned for that matter. But really think about it. Cords dependant on their structure and key can make us feel happy, sad, or even scared. But when should the influence of the songs stop, I like to think that as rational creatures we control emotion fairly well, and I will tell you right now that I don't like to show emotion to other people, but the harder I try it seems the easier I am to read. Thats not the point I was trying to make though, generally I consider myself the ice bitch when it comes to any emotion that is not widely accepted, like crying. Only 6 have seen me cry that I can readily think of, and each time I have been ashamed that someone should see that weekness and use it against me.

However that is not what I was trying to get at, once again I stray as is hiding from my true subject, the creative connection we have with lyrics. Not that people who listen to rap generally believe in its message, but songs have made me cry before, some that were the right words at the right moment that makes someone just break down. Speaking of which what is my point in this whole blog, and will it ever make sense? I don't know. This is horrible but I'm gong to post it anyways.